Warning

You're really becoming cloudy on this whole "experience" thing.

From Zelia's Day of Warning (April 1st) 2003. Tierus's Eryael serenade was preplanned, but the rest was improv.

[The Feystone Inn, Bedroom]
A small straw-tick bed covered with wrinkled sheets is shoved into a corner of the tiny room. So small there is barely room to squeeze a washstand in the opposite corner, the room's only luxury appears to be a cracked mirror hanging above the washstand. You also see a cracked mirror and a scarred monir door.
Also here: While searching for his lost Jiff, Tierus
Obvious exits: none

Tierus groans.

Tierus points at a scarred monir door.

Tierus nods.

Tierus just closed a scarred monir door.

You glance at a scarred monir door.

You see While searching for his lost Jiff, Tierus Morvaenus the Magician.
He appears to be a Dark Elf.
He appears to be young and robust and tall. He has piercing sapphire blue eyes and finely-bronzed, smooth caramel skin. He has shoulder length, silken silver-golden hair artfully feathered back to fall in lank quills to either side of his brow. He has a set of sharp features emphasized by the raised cheekbones of his face, a straight patrician nose and thickly muscled broad shoulders.
He has a faint scar on his neck.
He is in good shape.
He is wearing a large white gardenia, a gold ring, a supple crushed velvet moneybag, a twisted bloodjewel earring, a cobweb-covered jet black spidersilk cloak edged with silver silk trim, a blemished pearl and wire Mularos symbol, a wrought silver bramble necklet, a worn rust red leather longcoat, a gossamer ashen silk shirt, a sapphire-chip silver hawthorn wristlet, an emerald-chip silver rose wristlet, some raven-hued soft leather trousers, a set of thorny silver anklets, some pale horned leather hunts, and a mirror-finish pure krodera pavis.

Tierus latches a scarred monir door.

You glance at Tierus.

(Tierus does not say anything. In fact, he keeps his mouth completely closed. Really.)

You lean against a scarred monir door.

(Tierus just looks at Juspera.)

You fold your arms over your chest.

Tierus sings:

"Help me, my dear Juspera...
for there is no lass fairah...
Help me, my dear--
don't show me your rear!
Please help my dear Juspera."

Tierus sings:

"There seems to be a problem here!
I cannot cease to sing--oh, dear.
This talisman I swiftly bought,
but Whisp'ring Willow's in it not!
This talisman I swiftly bought,
but Whisp'ring Willow's in it NOT!"

(Juspera just stands there for a minute, then starts laughing silently.)

Tierus removes a circular talisman finely woven of tiny braided willow branches from in his spidersilk cloak.

(Tierus shakes his talisman furiously.)

You accept Tierus's offer and are now holding a circular talisman finely woven of tiny braided willow branches.

Tierus sings:

"Rub the thing and then you'll see..."

You say, "Uh huh."

Tierus sings:

"...that you are now quite damned--like me."

You sigh.

You rub a circular talisman finely woven of tiny braided willow branches.
1d100: 62 + Modifiers: 71 == 133
The spell misfires!
Nothing happens.
Cast Roundtime 3 Seconds.

You bite your lip.

Tierus has accepted your offer and is now holding a circular talisman finely woven of tiny braided willow branches.

You clear your throat.

Tierus sings:

"You see, I thought 'twas just a toy
for I, no more to elves than boy
do fancy myself quite the mage...
my testing run was hardly sage."

You grin.

Tierus clasps his hand over his mouth.

Tierus glowers.

You sing:

"Oh, I know well your fancy flights.
There's error where you set your sights.
I wait and pray that still someday
You'll know what I know: magedom bites."

You lean against a scarred monir door.

Tierus sings:

"Stop!
You say, or sing because you can't!
Sing!
You shall, until you burst your pants!
Sing sing sing...
Stop stop stop...
Please, rogue,
just my head lop off."

You stare at Tierus.

You remove a small razor-sharp hatchet from in your cloak.

Tierus sings:

"No!
You must not, for I'll then be dead!
Please,
do not remove my golden head!
No no no,
Please please please.
Not here
in this room of bed."

You sing:

"This head you give, it's not a trick?
I have a strong urge to rhyme that line, but I won't."

Tierus sings:

"What day is this that makes me sing?
Or spell, hid in that willow ring
I do not know, but must find out
Oh what I would give now to shouuuuuuut!"

You sing:

"I'd slay you for money, fame or pride.
I'd slay you where the dust motes hide.
I'd slay you just for poverty of verse
But for one thing, one thing comes first.
I'd slay and call the slay-ee vile,
But for your god, and his broad smile."

Tierus sings:

"So even now Mularos calls
and holds you in his painful thrall."

You grin.

Tierus sings:

"Fair Eryael has marked you deep...
and calls when you're eluding sleep?"

Tierus peers quizzically at you.

You sing:

"Of course the paingod's in my thoughs.
He ever feels, and slaughter thwarts--
What joy I'd find in flensing hide
If only he were not so snide!"

You put a small razor-sharp hatchet in your cloak.

You take a deep breath.

Tierus sings:

"They always ask "What can one try"
when hurting Gods who at hurt smile..."

Tierus sings:

"Let me tell you quite the tale
of one Pain Lord named Eryael..."

You sing:

"Eryael darling makes no calls.
He fears me still, he lacks the balls."

Tierus sings:

"Fair Eryael, your twisted lips are damned to haunt my dreams
where light is darkness and the dark is never what it seems.
If I could bring you back to me with sacrifice or prayer,
I would, full-knowing I could not but lay my heart-strings bare."

You scowl at Tierus.

Tierus sings:

"Just for your touch, I feel a hunger like a babe's, newborn,
no matter how my mind recoils, or how my senses warn.
Would that I were Tanager, with rose to recollect!
Instead, my mind's eye brims with thoughts of your hand on my neck."

Tierus sings:

"When marking me, was it for Sorrow, or mere pleasure thine?
This question comes to me, unhindered by sense-dead'ning wine.
Its verity is haunting, and I--disallowed escape--
must pause, to recollect love that makes much more of simple rape."

Tierus sings:

"Can worship ever be made pure, with such foundations base?
Will I be ever struck with mem'ries of your leering face?,
That cruel unworthy smile of yours is branded in my soul,
and where my loving heart resided, now is left a hole."

You hiss.

Tierus sings:

"This mark upon my neck is His, but it was made by you,
and deep inside I doubt that with it, I can be made true.
Yet indecision's ag'ny and what's wrought of loving pain
are my gifts to Mularos--So your mark, love, shall remain."

Tierus sings:

"Now that I've sung, please sing me true
does he not hold such sway o'er you?"

You mumble something under your breath.

You sing:

"Your Eryael, we call him Petal Boy.
So bold in pain, but still in promise coy.
His eyes would sell you all the gold in Ubl
And if you count on its receipt, you are a fool."

You tilt your head up.

You sniff.

Tierus sings:

"Ubl? Ubl, where is that?
Your rhyme in that one sounded flat!"

Your jaw drops.

You kick Tierus!

Tierus bites you! Of all the nerve!

You do your best impression of a grizzly, scaring people for miles!

Tierus sings:

"Oh, strange and wond'rous, little miss
You taste a lot like cockatrice!"

You sing:

"Oh? Yet to listen to your verse
I wonder if I'm masochistic yet.
Or worse."

Tierus sings:

"If masochistic you've been made,
I'll tell my Lord: Reward? Get laid."

Your jaw drops.

Tierus snickers.

Tierus sings:

"That's how we do things in pain's church
For pain, our pleasure, oh, fun hurts!"

You sing:

"The day I enjoy pain
Is the day we see Xulia reign
O'er the Turamzzyrian empire
Her crown flashing like fire
And a hundred apes holding her train."

You fold your arms over your chest.

Tierus sings:

"Fair Xulia, as Tamzyrr's Queen?
In line, she's number one-sixteen!
Who knows what's near, or 'round the bend
We'll pro'lly see her by year's end."

You laugh out loud!

Tierus sings:

"Poor monarchs in this time of strife
one resource they don't have is life."

You sing:

"It's a long war, and it's been rough.
If I can laugh now, that's enough.
If Eryael comes, and beckons you,
I'd stare right back and call his bluff."

Tierus sings:

"If Eryael were ever near
I'd think him more than slightly queer
You know he has not graced my skin
since this war was but two months in?
Bah. Where was that thought in my head?
I'd rather he'd just grace my bed."

You stare at Tierus.

You sing:

"If you and Eryael were lovers?
You'd get no sleep. He'd steal the covers."

Tierus sings:

"If he did that, I'd hurt the wench.
And sit him like a town square bench."

You snicker.

Tierus sings:

"And speaking of guys hot--erm, fair
What happened between you and Caer?"

You sing:

"I've heard before about your type.
If love's ambrosia, that stuff's tripe.
So what's your crest? A sword and hinds?
You've heard folks talk: it takes all kinds."

Tierus sings:

"I see you're thinking--slowly, still
Did he give you a ring or bill?"

You mutter something about Caer.

Tierus sings:

"My crest, if you must really know
is eight be-rubied bats aglow
amidst the grey of fair twilight
where light meets dark and day meets night."

You sing:

"He was a plaything, little more--
I never set a handsome store
In how he acted, walked, or talked,
But heavens, how the loveless gawked
To see me arm in arm with him
A famous merchant, deft and slim."

Tierus sings:

"Not quite so slim without his shirt
--although some swordwork couldn't hurt--
but, ah, my Lords, how broad his back...
erm, what were we singing about?"

Tierus blinks.

You laugh out loud!

You sing:

"You really are a foul thing.
Your talk's enough, but now you sing!
I'd like to kick you hard enough
Your entire body'd need a sling."

Tierus sings:

"And what about that half-Dhe'nar
Oh, what was that old man's name... Mnar?
You seem to have him in your hand
...if you know what I mean. Heh. Hand."

You sing:

"If you must know, we've something planned."

You show Tierus your frost opal band.

Tierus sings:

"My word, is he to play the Harun
to your Gretel Goldenhair?
I could not see you as a lemon,
although you are far more fair."

You sing:

"When our war's over, birds will sing
And we'll exchange the holy ring
Our vows will ring o'er all the land
They each will know we're wife and man."

You blink.

You run a hand over your long red hair, trying to make yourself presentable.

Tierus sings:

"When this war's done, I'll go back home
Amidst the grass and perfumed loam...
Well, really, not, 'cause loam's just odd.
In 'Haven, we don't smell dirt clods."

You sing:

"And then, when sunset's fire limns
The starry-speckled night, we'll climb
The final alabaster stair,
Make manifest in flesh our care
And let our love sing for all time:
And be a happy happy pair!"

You glance at Tierus.

Tierus sings:

"That sounds like such a fine idea
Wed by the sunset near the sea
What pleasant thoughts of wedding's lock...
...oh, who kid I? That's such a crock."

>report Emergency. I want a title.

SEND[Elbrion] <<evil laugh>>

SEND[Mahegh] Your wish is my command.

SEND[Bunny Foofoo] Can we just choose one for you?

Tierus sings:

"Besides, you two can't reproduce
You know, there's things wrong with his juice.
They say they're poison, through and through
Would you let him put that in you?"

Tierus peers quizzically at you.

You make a horrendous warthog-like noise.

You sing:

"You've little luck with women, cad.
What thought's on why your luck's so bad?
Your mind is ill, your mouth is foul,
Your drool would benefit from a towel."

Your current TITLE display is:

"It's Not My Fault" Juspera Spintari.
She appears to be a Dark Elf.

Tierus sings:

"Perhaps I've fewer than you've men
...but that's to be expected, then.
Those whom I've loved have loved me true
And were not paid for it, like you."

You make a horrendous warthog-like noise.

Tierus sings:

"But seriously, try me out
and we'll see if I make you shout.
I am Mularos's Rake-at-Large
C'mon over: there's no charge!"

(Tierus gestures toward the bed, grinning rakishly.)

You sing:

"That's wrong, I never paid for love
Or for affection, gods above.
I simply know how to survive.
You, on the streets? Be skinned alive."

Tierus sings:

"You've never paid for love? Hrm. True
That's 'cause the guys have paid for you!"

You wave your hand in a dismissive gesture.

Announcement: We've rolled in a new change this evening to critters. All will now be lovely pink monkeys, fluffy bunnies, or the ever popular furry rolton. Please be nice to the bunnies and have a good night.

Tierus sings:

"You're slow of wit, but quick of blade.
If you were male, you might get laid."

Tierus nods to you.

You sing:

"You clearly wish to dub me Whore
Since you yourself deserve no more.
Since clearly you cannot improve
Yourself, it's no surprise that you've
Long sought to bring the women down
Who catch your eye. Who'd date a clown?
No lass like me, and that's for sure."

Tierus sings:

"But seriously, foul pear
Why not just try a test, 'neath there?"

(Tierus points to the covers on his bed.)

You sing:

"Your proposition's horse manure."

Tierus sings:

"You must admit, you like that which
I have allowed you thus to see.
If you had but a willow switch
I might let you see all of me."

Tierus nods to you.

You quickly remove a coil of thick rope from your cloak and snap your arm out, as if grabbing the rope from thin air.
Roundtime: 2 sec.

You glance at Tierus.

(Tierus reaches up to the top button of his gossamer shirt, not that it hides much of his musculature as it is.)

Tierus winks at you.

You clench your jaw.

Tierus sings:

"For a lass who's not a virgin
you sure need a lot of urgin'.
Would it help if this shirt went away
Then we could start our inn-ward play?"

Tierus sings:

"You strike me as a woman
Who is not too curious to see.
I hope that's not an omen
For few others have resisted me.
Why not, Juspera, give a try?
Would doing that just make you die?"

You sing:

"I've all the normal appetites
Of women, and yes, there've been nights
I've let my standards droop just so
I'd have a man. And then I'd go.
But you, my dear, are not a man.
I'd rather bed a panting shan."

Tierus sings:

"I think your problem is that you've
not seen a man like me.
I'm on a higher plane of manhood
Alone, eternally.
If I were looking for a word deep down within my heart
I'd have to settle for a phrase: I am a work of art."

(Tierus finishes unbuttoning his shirt.)

You do your best impression of a grizzly, scaring people for miles!

You sing:

"You've got that right, you caramel jerk
You truly are a piece of work."

Tierus sings:

"You try to be a tigress, dear,
but we know you're not that.
If I had to describe you here...
I'd say: "a pussy...cat.""

Tierus winks at you.

Tierus sings:

"Besides, no one would ever know
Who'd tell them? Me? Of course not. No...
I know I'm what you've wanted, sweet.
Let passion and the real world meet."

You sing:

"Oh I'm a kitten, we all know.
My fierce exterior's just for show.
Less soft than some, but more than most.
Those bodies in my yard? Compost."

Tierus sings:

"Those bodies in the yard, you say?
Or just old men who came to play.
And driven by their lust and thirst
in bed, you just made their hearts burst."

You laugh out loud!

You sing:

"So what am I? Why did they lust?
Was it my face? My shallow bust?
Perhaps they only liked my smell
Of leather, metal, ire, and hell."

Tierus sings:

"Those sentiments are really nice.
But maybe it was just...
your price?"

You kick Tierus!

Tierus bites you! Of all the nerve!

Tierus sings:

"Like cockatrice, I said you taste
But from a rolton came your face."

You sing:

"That speaketh oh-so-well of you.
You'd bed a rolton? Now that's new."

Tierus sings:

"Not from the rolton's head, dear, mind
But rather, from its pink behind."

Tierus sings:

"I've bedded lasses like you tons
but roltons? No. No!
...only once."

You laugh out loud!

You sing:

"So when's this horrid thing wear off?"

You idly scratch your neck.

Tierus stares off into space.

Tierus sings:

"I do not know,
Sir Blank-of-Mind.
A remedy
we ought to find!"

Tierus whispers, "I died. For a second."

You mutter something inaudible.

You sing:

"I'm not helping you. It's health you covet?
Well you can take your health, and shove it."

Tierus sings:

"I think perhaps you miss the point.
A cure's for both. Let's blow this joint!
Unless, of course, you'd like to sing...
Oh, I don't know. Hm. EVERYTHING?"

Tierus stares at you.

You sing:

"You were sick before, you can stay sick now.
You deserve no more than what the fates allow."

You stare at Tierus.

You sing:

"...Fine."

Tierus sings:

"That's what I thought, so... ZING ZANG ZOT!
We'll find a cure for this... or ROT!"

Tierus clearly says, "...or, we could just not sing everything."

Tierus coughs.

You say, "Good show."

Tierus clearly says, "I thought that might work when the talisman fixed itself."

Tierus clearly says, "...that was about half an hour ago."

Tierus nods to you.

You say, "Uh huh."

Tierus clearly says, "So... um... you want to..."

(Tierus nods toward the bed.)

Tierus clearly says, "Y'know."

(Juspera twitches the end of the rope in her hand.)

You glance at Tierus.

Tierus clearly asks, "Ooh. Randy, aren't we?"

(Tierus examines the rope in Juspera's hand, practically salivating.)

You say, "No, I'm Juspera."

Tierus clearly says, "Oh. Right. Randy was last week."

You see "I Guess the Foolin's Over" Tierus Morvaenus the Magician.
He appears to be a Dark Elf.
He appears to be young and robust and tall. He has piercing sapphire blue eyes and finely-bronzed, smooth caramel skin. He has shoulder length, silken silver-golden hair artfully feathered back to fall in lank quills to either side of his brow. He has a set of sharp features emphasized by the raised cheekbones of his face, a straight patrician nose and thickly muscled broad shoulders.
He has a faint scar on his neck.
He is in good shape.
He is wearing a large white gardenia, a gold ring, a supple crushed velvet moneybag, a twisted bloodjewel earring, a cobweb-covered jet black spidersilk cloak edged with silver silk trim, a blemished pearl and wire Mularos symbol, a wrought silver bramble necklet, a worn rust red leather longcoat, a gossamer ashen silk shirt, a sapphire-chip silver hawthorn wristlet, an emerald-chip silver rose wristlet, some raven-hued soft leather trousers, a set of thorny silver anklets, some pale horned leather hunts, and a mirror-finish pure krodera pavis.

You look closely at Tierus, examining some pale horned leather hunts. Crafted of supple, pallid white leather, these hunts are adorned with iridescent bluish scaling that highlights their edges. The chest bears no mark save for a small stylized mournbloom trailing about a silver dagger-pierced heart. The armor's shoulders are unusually broad, as if specially tailored. Each is crowned by a single curving horn of age-darkened ivory. The smooth horns spread from the shoulders like the wings of a predatory bird.

Tierus clearly asks, "Anyway. So, you want to... erm, talk about Eryael and get naked and a display of mutual self-deprecation and needful humiliating catharsis?"

You say, "If you think about it, we already did that, metaphorically."

Tierus clearly says, "Yeah, kind of."

Tierus snaps his fingers.

Tierus clearly asks, "...um, cigar?"

Tierus peers quizzically at you.

You say, "You're speaking so clearly now."

You say, "I knew we should have had that obstruction removed from your mouth a long time ago."

Tierus clearly says, "Clearly I am."

Tierus clearly says, "Actually, I think I hurt my jaw."

You ask, "Oh?"

(Tierus hurriedly explains, "Evelith.")

You blink.

Tierus clearly says, "You had better go. I do not want Mnar coming in here to gut a cockatrice."

You say, "Uh huh."

[The Feystone Inn, Bedroom]
A small straw-tick bed covered with wrinkled sheets is shoved into a corner of the tiny room. So small there is barely room to squeeze a washstand in the opposite corner, the room's only luxury appears to be a cracked mirror hanging above the washstand. You also see a cracked mirror and a scarred monir door.
Also here: "I Guess the Foolin's Over" Tierus
Obvious exits: none

You say, "I'm getting out of here."

You sniff.

You unlatch a scarred monir door.

Ok, it opened.

(Tierus gets a blank look on his face.)

Tierus clearly says, "Yeah. Good idea."

Tierus clearly says, "By the way..."

You give your eyebrow a little workout.

Tierus clearly asks, "Erm..." He points to his chest, a crooked grin on his face. "Liked what you saw?"

You glance at Tierus.

You say, "Even if you were naked, there'd still be too much in the way."

You move toward a scarred monir door, striding away.

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